The mind takes on a life of it's own...
For anyone who struggles with worry, dread, fear, or pessimism, Mark Twain said something that has just resonated so deeply to me lately: “I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.”
I hate that most of what kills me day in and day out is almost strictly happening between my own ears. I can have 14 meetings in my head before the 'actual' meeting and then 7 meetings in my head after the 'actual' meeting...that's 22 meetings, 21 of which never happened. That's often 44 hours of time only 2 of which were spent in the actual meeting. I can also go down mental wormholes of thought living out my worst nightmares and worst case scenerios consequently dying a thousand deaths only to return to reality and realize it was all in my head. That is not to say that the toll on the soul doesn't happen, cause the deaths you die in the wormhole take years off your life just the same. Things don't have to actually happen for them to affect you physiologically and psychologically. You can emerge from a daydream or a night terror breathing heavy as if you just outran an assailant. But that's the sad thing, it never happened.
It's hard enough to deal with what actually happens. To respond to hurt or rejection. To bounce back from disappointment or failure. To conquer risky things that take boldness to actually do. Add to the already brutal realities of life the glut of fatalistic fabrications our minds make up and it's no wonder we can't sleep or rest or laugh or create.
That's why when Paul says to the Corinthians in his second letter to "take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ", I think he's talking about all these unruly and irrational fears that seek to steal away our time and energy. To take thoughts captive I think we have to bring them into a room and interrogate them as the terrorists they are.
We have to get them to squeal and tell us a couple things: 1) Where did you come from? and 2) What is your purpose? After gathering that intel, we can figure out what they are trying to stop us from doing. When I can find the purpose of why the Enemy is dispatching these fiery darts to pierce my soul and these messages (messengers) of Satan to buffet me, I can figure out how to make sure I keep doing what the Enemy is seeking to stop. I can't tell you how many times the interrogation of my thought life has led me to some important intell that helps me do some reconnaissance on the Enemy's schemes to discourage and destroy me.
I'm not saying everything goes away, but when Satan knows you have a bead and read on his strategies, it changes things. When you're using his attacks to figure out his fears, you begin to use his tactics against him. His best weapon is stolen and used to attack him. He tends to back away for a bit to look for another point of entry or another area of vulnerability. These are just some thoughts from the fox hole...if they are useful to you, wonderful. If not, let me know if you've found better counter measures.
All I know is that I'm trying to eliminate, little by little, the amount of time spent in my head living false or alternative narratives. I want to be present in my actual story and the more I take the bait to live in the "ethereal elsewhere", the less time I spend living my one, solitary, unique, fleeting life on this earth.
I'm grateful for Mark Twain and his wisdom. That one quote is the gift that keeps on giving as I continue to attempt to live a fruitful and faithful life.
I hate that most of what kills me day in and day out is almost strictly happening between my own ears. I can have 14 meetings in my head before the 'actual' meeting and then 7 meetings in my head after the 'actual' meeting...that's 22 meetings, 21 of which never happened. That's often 44 hours of time only 2 of which were spent in the actual meeting. I can also go down mental wormholes of thought living out my worst nightmares and worst case scenerios consequently dying a thousand deaths only to return to reality and realize it was all in my head. That is not to say that the toll on the soul doesn't happen, cause the deaths you die in the wormhole take years off your life just the same. Things don't have to actually happen for them to affect you physiologically and psychologically. You can emerge from a daydream or a night terror breathing heavy as if you just outran an assailant. But that's the sad thing, it never happened.
It's hard enough to deal with what actually happens. To respond to hurt or rejection. To bounce back from disappointment or failure. To conquer risky things that take boldness to actually do. Add to the already brutal realities of life the glut of fatalistic fabrications our minds make up and it's no wonder we can't sleep or rest or laugh or create.
That's why when Paul says to the Corinthians in his second letter to "take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ", I think he's talking about all these unruly and irrational fears that seek to steal away our time and energy. To take thoughts captive I think we have to bring them into a room and interrogate them as the terrorists they are.
We have to get them to squeal and tell us a couple things: 1) Where did you come from? and 2) What is your purpose? After gathering that intel, we can figure out what they are trying to stop us from doing. When I can find the purpose of why the Enemy is dispatching these fiery darts to pierce my soul and these messages (messengers) of Satan to buffet me, I can figure out how to make sure I keep doing what the Enemy is seeking to stop. I can't tell you how many times the interrogation of my thought life has led me to some important intell that helps me do some reconnaissance on the Enemy's schemes to discourage and destroy me.
I'm not saying everything goes away, but when Satan knows you have a bead and read on his strategies, it changes things. When you're using his attacks to figure out his fears, you begin to use his tactics against him. His best weapon is stolen and used to attack him. He tends to back away for a bit to look for another point of entry or another area of vulnerability. These are just some thoughts from the fox hole...if they are useful to you, wonderful. If not, let me know if you've found better counter measures.
All I know is that I'm trying to eliminate, little by little, the amount of time spent in my head living false or alternative narratives. I want to be present in my actual story and the more I take the bait to live in the "ethereal elsewhere", the less time I spend living my one, solitary, unique, fleeting life on this earth.
I'm grateful for Mark Twain and his wisdom. That one quote is the gift that keeps on giving as I continue to attempt to live a fruitful and faithful life.
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